***Sappy Rant Alert***

So, I am home. For those unaware my son (6 weeks old) had to go into the hospital for surgery. The whole ordeal with him has been quite a shocker. See, my wife and I have always had healthy children. Our previous 4 haven't  had a single issue that wasn't out of the ordinary, wait okay, our second is a MAJOR CLUTZ and has gotten us into the ER many a time. 

Usually we have the baby, recover, go home and get back to life as usual. Our little Zach has taken us out of our comfort zone. Before he even arrived we were shook that something was wrong. I am totally grateful for our nurses and doctors that took care of us. They were first rate and made this trial as easy to stomach as possible. With each step I would try to pause, take a deep breath and move on. We are not completely out of the woods. The surgery went well but we have to keep a close eye on Zachary to make sure nothing else goes afoul. 

While in the hospital my wife and I shared a couch, taking turns holding Zachary in a chair. Neither of us got much sleep and with the nurses coming in to check vitals and bleepers going off every other minute what sleep we got was less than great, but thats okay. Everything was about getting Zachary better and healthy. 

It was interesting being in the hospital. See, as anyone that knows me, I am weird. I don't talk, I listen. Being at the hospital with nothing to do but support my wife and baby I had plenty of time and people to observe. One thing that I learned is that I am very grateful for the people that I have in my life. Two is that you have to love. I know that this is a Hippie Dippie point of view, but its mine. You have to love. 

Being in the hospital I was completely shoved out of my comfort zone, and for me when I am tired hungry and uncomfortable it is hard to not get irritable and fussy. I did have a moment or two where I was tempted and tempted hard to erupt and be snide. Luckily I have a wife that knows me well and would say the right words to get my attention without starting a fight because she loves me. 

Observing I saw many bitter, using just the right words or actions to unleash harm. Don't do that. Love, love with all your heart. Take your love and give it away to everyone and everything that you come across. Anger begets anger but love diffuses anger and allows peace to reign. One thing that my mother taught me early on, life isn't fair, and if you try to life your life making everything fair you won't necessarily find love. Someone says or does something nasty to you can return with the same filth or you can pause take a deep breath and send love back their way. Its harder to fight with someone smiling at you than someone that is willing to fight with you. Someone cuts you off in traffic you can get even and make things "fair" or you can let them go. 

I myself am not a perfect person. I try everyday to be the best person I can be. I used to try and live life fair, but it just didn't seem to get me anywhere. I was even but empty. Then I found Jesus Christ. I had known about him for a long time but never REALLY followed what his thing was, it was love. He encourages me to just love, just throw all the love that you can muster away. Its not going into the trash that love is going out into the world. You make think that you are wasting your time but many of those seeds of love will take root, sprout and grow and bear fruits many times over. If you just hold all of your love inside you just turn cold for the world around you is what you sew, and that's all I got to say about that.