Wednesday, November 11, 2015
A Poem: I'm Home
I’m Home
The son rises again holding off the pain
While the walls are closing in
Grinding hard each day
Where is the kill-switch to stop the cold release
I can hear the screaming from the past lives receding
Held up inside this room I call you
You can come in
But the chains they won’t let go
Forged with the burning sins
I can see the smiles and the winces of the pain
Such a delusion is the pleasure from the pain
I go out, get bound and become enslaved from time to time
I get lost in the weeds that try to cut me down
It don’t matter ‘bout the time or day of week
He will stand by my side
Pull me out and make me clean
Back into the room where I learn to keep the day
Where its warm and where I’m loved in his house, serenity
I’m home
Where I’m loved
I’m home
In your heart above
I wrote this poem about myself in reflection and others that I love so much. I know that it's an old idea but I believe in sin. I believe in evil. In a world that seems to make everyone's point of view "ok" I do believe that there is true right and true wrong. Too many times I have seen brilliant artists get sucked in by lifestyles that feed their ego and desire. In the beginning it may see like heaven but all to often they fall into personal hells. I have to admit I have been sucked into sinful pleasure on several occasion. I always think that it's a "break" or a "one time thing". It doesn't work that way. It's a slippery slope that always starts with a lie. I am grateful for Jesus Christ being in my life. I am thankful that I have found my way. I am so thankful for all he blessings I have, and I pray that all my fallen friends will find their way out. I am there at any hour. I am not perfect. I am no savior. Only Jesus can save. I feel safe, happy and at peace in his "home".
Michael
Whisper Behind the Light
A Poem: Through the Storm
Through the Storm
Holding back the rain or at least trying
The winds they push my fingers apart
Silence no where to be found
The raging thunder is sharp in my ear
Still I try still I hold
The earth once firm like granite beneath me
Now runs to mud
Slippery like wet clay
My toes dig in they sink they’re gone
Still I try still I hold
From a heart that bleeds that heart deceives
I see the sun off in the distance
Still I try still I hold
The rain won’t dry for its bitter sum
The cracks and clashes aren’t yet done
So dark inside they can’t look out
Still I try still I hold
I wrote this when thinking of friends lost in their own misery. Nothing is worse than seeing someone you love living in agony and so lost in it that they cannot find their way out. What can you do? Me personally I love, pray and support best I can. People are too beautiful to live drowning in pain, but never forget, you are beautiful. You never have to be "stuck" in a situation. Short of being held captive the only one holding us back is ourselves.
Michael
Whisper Behind the Light
You Ever Have That Needy Friend?
I was talking to my students recently and I asked them, “How do you treat your friends? How do they treat you?”
Have you ever had one of those friends that after a while doesn’t seem like much of a friend cause every time they get a hold of you they want you to do something or give them something? How do you treat your friends? Are you the person that is always doing the asking?
I hope not, most of us realize that a good friendship is one where we help and nurture each other. Maybe not on a mushy gushy level but we love one another and help each other out. We share interests or passions. We support each other in our endeavors. Maybe we work or play a sport or other extracurricular activity together.
Point is, a friend is supposed someone that we share our time with that we care about. It’s a mutual two way street of giving and receiving. Sometimes with friends we say things that we don’t want to, but because we love them we do cause we care about our friend.
I have asked people to tell me what God looks like. I usually get a variety of answers from “I don’t know” to “Some old guy with a large white beard…” Thing is when I look to my past I realized that I might have thought God looked like the old man with the big white beard, but I treated him like an ATM or a Genie. God wants to be your friend. He loves you and is waiting for you to love him in return. I can’t tell you how many times I have been in trouble and prayed something like, “Oh geez God please get me out of this one or give me this money I need and I will do whatever you want!”
I hope this doesn’t sound familiar.
I have never walked up to a friend of mine and asked them, “Hey I am supposed todo the dishes tonight you want to come over and help me? Actually you can wash and dry I will supervise. Oh, and after you are done can you wipe down the counters, stove and what not? Oh and that nasty, slimy food in the drain strainer can you clean that out too cause I hate touching that stuff.” God wants a friendship, he wants a relationship. He doesn’t just want to cleanup after you. He already knows you but he wants you to take the time to get to know him. God has so much to share. He even sent his son, Jesus, to tell us about him. Jesus not only taught us about God but about each other and how to love everyone you meet. Jesus took the time to teach us to create a little heaven here on earth. Problem is not many people listen. After Jesus left God sent the Holy Spirit cause God NEVER wanted us to be without him. God NEVER wants us to be alone, why, cause God loves you. You are amazing otherwise God wouldn’t have made you. God only makes good things. It’s man and Satan that corrupts and turns things bad. Your potential is amazing. You have abilities and talents that you might not even know you have. God is waiting to help you tap in to all that he has given you. God wants you to find peace and happiness, and it all starts by being a friend of God. All you have to do is pray, talk, open your heart to God. Take 15 minutes everyday and read a bit of the Gospels. Once a week goto Church, are you nervous or afraid? There is no reason to be afraid. Jesus is waiting for you. He made the Church for you. Church is a gift for you. If you are nervous, pray. Ask for help from the Holy Spirit. Ask for courage to go to Church. Ask that nerdy church guy/gal where they go to church.
Every year I have one thing I want for Christmas. I want all my family and friends to goto Church with me. For me that would be so cool. That would be the best present ever, to be able to share my faith, and my source of peace and happiness with everyone I know.
God gives so much. He all he wants is for you to return in love to him so that he can share even more.
Luke 17:11-19
11On the way to Jerusalem he was passing along between Sama'ria and Galilee. 12And as he entered a village, he was met by ten lepers, who stood at a distance 13and lifted up their voices and said, "Jesus, Master, have mercy on us." 14When he saw them he said to them, "Go and show yourselves to the priests." And as they went they were cleansed. 15Then one of them, when he saw that he was healed, turned back, praising God with a loud voice; 16and he fell on his face at Jesus' feet, giving him thanks. Now he was a Samaritan. 17Then said Jesus, "Were not ten cleansed? Where are the nine? 18Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?" 19And he said to him, "Rise and go your way; your faith has made you well."
Michael
Whisper Behind the Light
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
Halloween Pictures, I Look Like WHAT?!?!
 |
| Get this book here. |
Just recently I went Trick or Treating with my children, It was a long trying and testing night. We went to church, changed into costumes at the park headed out for a few blocks, then got something to eat at a fast food place, visited some relatives and took some pictures. I have children with ages spread out so its interesting to see how each age reacts to Halloween or anything in general. At our last stop we took a picture for Mama and Papa and I had to hold up one of my children so they could all fit in the frame. We went home and it was fun night. Much to my surprise though was the picture I saw the next day with my children in their Halloween costumes. My gut was sticking 5 miles out. Now I will be honest, I have never thought that I was Arnold Schwarzenegger, but I don't consider myself out of shape, till now.
Thats the funny thing with out lives though. we never really see ourselves as we are. We have an imagined view of what we look like and who we are but sometimes its when we hear loose acquaintances talk about how we are we get shocked with the observation. For many years I thought I was an okay guy. I went through life and never thought much about where I was or where I was going. Fact was I was heading 100mph down a dead end street. It wasn't until I crashed and everything fell apart that I actually decided to take stock in who I was, where I was going and how I treated other people.
Self refection is one of the things that I love most about my Christianity. I am catholic and through prayer I find refection. Through my study of Jesus Christ I have not only and example of how to live but a rule to judge my life by. Will I ever be perfect, no. I am a broken soul, with God's grace I can get there. There was a time period where I doubted faith in God. Then I accepted that their might be a God but that I didn't need him. After I looked around, studied, tried that prayer thing and probed with a skeptical eye I came to believe, but I didn't think that I was worthy of God's love.
I sought his council and thought that at the very least I could learn how to be a better person while I was here before I went to hell for all the bad things I had done. It was through this study, learning, trial and error that I found the Catholic Church. Through my faith and peering into the "Catholic thing" I found beauty, acceptance, unconditional love and forgiveness. I know that when some think of the Catholic Church they think of scandal with the priests and young children. That is not the Catholic faith. That was a complete tragedy.
I'll be honest I am glad that it was uncovered. It hurt so many in our faith and so many left for good but it needed to happen so that the priests and others involved could be removed, so that the children could be safe. The Church was not seeing itself for all that it was. Was Catholicism broken? No, people in the Catholic Church were broken. Satan found a cracked door and let himself in. He created doubt in a faith and used that get people to hate God and his Church. I remember when I was young before I became Catholic something similar happened at my Protestant church. This isn't a Catholic problem, it's a human problem. It's a fight over good and evil inside us all. We each have our own weaknesses and if we don't deal with them, if we don't take the time to see ourselves for what we really are then we allow ourselves to be fooled. We allow ourselves to fall. We allow ourselves to run 100mph into a brick wall.
That is why I am thankful to have God in my life. It's why I heed his call to self reflect and surround myself with those that will show concern if I get off track. That's why I attend mass each week to learn and grow. It's why I take part in the sacraments so that I can receive the grace I need to fight off temptation. It's why I go to Confession so that I am forced to reflect and ask for forgiveness of what I have done and do penance. It's when I walk away from God and my faith that I fall, not by being a part of it. I learn to love. I learn to give. I learn to care for the sick, poor, and unappreciated. I learn to love God and love the way God wants, unconditionally holding nothing back with everyone I meet. I am not perfect. I am still a sinner, but I am better than I once was and will continue to improve with God's help.
So if my guts sticks out, okay, I can handle that. A few sit-ups can cure that, but what about my soul? That's whats really important. This body is temporary. My soul is eternal. I invite you pray today and ask God to help you see yourself as you are, in life and in faith. I invite you to let the best life trainer into your life, God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I promise if you listen and heed they won't let you down.
If you are interested in getting to know God, I highly recommend this book: Rediscover Jesus.
Have a blessed week,
Michael
Whisper Behind the Light
Friday, November 6, 2015
My song, "Pardon Me (cause I love you)"
"Pardon Me (cause I love you)"
Tuesday, November 3, 2015
The Great Thing About Teenagers?
I am lucky, I have a teenaged son. Now those of you who have teenagers at home maybe scratching your head thinking, "What is this guy nuts. I wish my teen would flip back to the easy days of elementary school or fast forward and run off to college. At least I could have my bathroom back." I will not lie, there are times when I find myself challenged by my son, but every once in a while when things get tense I get the urge to stop and take a breath and realize, "Hey he needs me. This is part of my purpose here on earth. Man up and be the Dad you are needed to be." Being a father to a teen really grounds me, mostly because many of the mistakes he makes are ones that I make, or come close to making each day. I might not leave my dirty clothes on the floor, but I do have to be careful not to take advantage of my wonderful wife. I might not break the lawn mower cause I am being careless, I may hurt someone I love by not paying attention to what I am saying. My teenager needs me wether he wants to admit it or not. Just like I need God wether I realize it or not. The days I get off track and act like a jerk are the days I disconnect from God. The days that I loose my patience are usually the days I don't take time to read Jesus' teachings. The days that I am weak and fall to temptation are usually the days that I don't ask for help from the Holy Spirit. I am far from perfect and in my past I was well on my way to being sinner of profound status, but with God's help I can become the best I can be. When I read Jesus' teachings I learn to love and respect others like I should. When I pray and ask for help the Holy Spirit aids me and keeps me on the right path. God is my father and best confidant. I may not always like what he has to say to me, but deep down I know its right. So if I ever feel like I am falling or teetering close to the edge all I got to do is call. I pray to God. I ask for his advice. I read the teachings of Jesus Christ. I attend mass and take part in the wonderful sacraments that God has given to me as gifts. I don't deserve them, but thats not the point. God loves me and he knows what I can become with his help. Like any good friend I keep him close, and because he is a good father I do my best to heed his advice.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)